"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Nicolas Cage

Nicolas Cage paced back and forth along 53rd Street.  The bad guys were closing in.  Think, dammit, think!

For the hundredth time, he recited the cryptic clue that had been written on the back of the Emancipation Proclamation.  "His namesake points to what he chewed… 'Twas in the Presidential mouth, but was not food."

There must be something obvious he was missing, he thought, as he looked at his anxious reflection in the black SUV.

The black SUV's nameplate said "Lincoln."

Eyes widening, he turned to the building behind him.  The right corner of the Lincoln--"right" for Lincoln's right moral actions during the Civil War, of course--was pointing at a second story window.  He could make out a tiny speck on the ledge.  "…what he chewed… was not food…"

"Come on!" he yelled to his sidekicks.  "Abraham Lincoln's gum is on that window ledge!"

"National Treasure 3" -- coming in 2011.


  1. In this photo it looks like the gum is down on the ground with The Cage, and if so, the gum is huge. Why doesn't The Cage have an entourage? Cage Fight, perhaps?

  2. The gum is normal size. But it always looms huge in our visual perspective, and in our minds. It is rapidly on its way to becoming the most famous gum in the world.

  3. The Toast in the MachineMay 13, 2011 at 8:35 PM

    Thank God for summer reruns. I missed this episode the first time around...