"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Friday, June 24, 2011

Mark Harmon

When CelebriGum started last summer, the gum was an unknown.  It was thrilled to have a gig at all, and couldn't have been more modest and cooperative.

Those were the days.

Fast forward a year.  It's contract renewal time for the world's most famous piece of old gum, and it knows it's got me over a barrel.  Big pay raise, more days off, a private trailer, a cut of the merchandising…yes, sure, of course.  But the real diva behavior is the gum's demand that in a certain percentage of the pictures, it must be in focus rather than the celebrity. 

Sorry, Mark.  I had no choice.

16 comments:

  1. Something new: Lytro's new "light field" camera shoots everything in focus and lets you pick the focal point, or the entire picture can be in focus. You can get one later this year.

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  2. Yeah, I read about that. Very cool. I wonder if you can get multiple versions from one shot, i.e., one version with, say, the gum in focus, and one version with, say, the back of a celebrity's head in focus?

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  3. You've got some mighty uppity Gum, there! Not that it doesn't deserve some sort of extra compensation, since it's obviously brought you fame and fortune, but really, who's the boss here! Enough is enough!

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  4. TMZ is now reporting the gum is demanding $1.8 million per photo and was quoted as saying that it has turned your ""tin can" photos into pure gold". Shocking and disturbing, to say the least.

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  5. The gum isn't in a great position to make demands since being caught with a briefcase of soot.

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  6. The Toast in the MachineJune 26, 2011 at 2:04 AM

    Ha! Lucy said "EXTRA" compensation. Would that compensation be sugar-free?

    Karl and Steve: "Gnarly Dentyne" almost rhymes with "Charlie Sheen."

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  7. Concerned. Celebrigum is sure looking backed in that sun. Can someone not spray him and make him nice and juicy once more

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  8. You're right Steve. Come winter that gum will be out in the cold.

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