"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Katie Holmes

Katie called me the day before she was scheduled to appear on the Late Show. "Steve, you know I love CelebriGum, but if I have one complaint, it's the drabness of many of the pictures."

"I know," I said.  "I try to include red taillights and orange safety cones, but many days it's a lot of gray sidewalk, cloudy weather, black cars, and people in black clothing.  Not to mention the gray, sooty gum.  What can we do?"

"I'll bring my blue tarp and put it over a pile of stuff on the sidewalk."  

"That's a start."  

"And I can carry something colorful.  Maybe a peacock," Katie said.

"Don't do that.  Paul Shaffer's Canadian, and Canadians are allergic to peacocks."

"Oh, right.  How about I hold a dozen bananas."

"That would work, but you can't have bananas in New York anymore.  Mayor Bloomberg banned them because the peels are a slipping hazard."

"Good lord.  Okay, well, I'll figure out something."

Katie came up with a great solution.  That striking flash of red is the bouquet of flowers from the backstage utility closet where the remains of Ed Sullivan are stored.  They change the flowers every day anyway; it wasn't really stealing.  



6 comments:

  1. The Toast in the MachineMay 7, 2011 at 6:10 PM

    So, that's where all that TARP money went.

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  2. Caption: "Red roses aren't my favorite. Um, do your RESEARCH, people!" :D

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  3. The red roses aren't meant for you, Ms. Notapinkgirl. You're not paying attention!

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  4. Terap today, gone tarpmorrow

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  5. Whhops that failed then lol


    Tarp today,gone tapmarrow

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  6. I would make a joke about Tom's fist coming up to hit your for taking Katie's photo, but I'm way above making jokes about that.

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