"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Friday, January 20, 2012

Jeremy Irvine

The Late Show was excited to welcome Jeremy, the breakout star of the Steven Spielberg film "War Horse."

The Late Show also tried to book the horse, but its demands were just too outrageous.  Private jet.  Private stable in midtown. (Do you know how hard that is to find?)  Bushels of organic carrots from a certain farm in Vermont.  And "dates" with hot, slutty horses from Golden Saddle Equine Escorts.

Forget it.  That's not how we do business. 


  1. How exactly do you do business?

    1. I don't actually know. I'm in a different department.

  2. Rewrite Pitch: "The Late Show also tried to book the horse, his demands were just too outrageous. Private jet. Private stable in midtown. (Do you know how hard that is to find?) Bushels of organic carrots from a certain farm in Vermont. And "dates" with hot, slutty horses from Golden Saddle Equine Escorts. And the Horse wanted stuff too."

    I don't know if that works. I expect your notes on my desk by the end of the night.

    1. Notes (sorry they're late):

      1. Good typing.
      2. Though it has the structure of a joke, I don't understand it. What is "the horse" vs. "the Horse"?
      3. There always has to be a third beat in comedy.

    2. 3. Wiiiiiiiiiillllllbuuuuuuuurrrrrr

    3. I'm saying Jeremy Irvine wanted those things. I don't know how to tell that joke well, I guess it's the mislead.

      I don't know why I capitalized horse.

  3. Heard he was also demanding front row tickets to Equus.

  4. The Toast in the MachineJanuary 21, 2012 at 6:21 PM

    So, he demanded dates with some war whores?

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