"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Monday, January 16, 2012

Tom Cruise


Tom Cruise arrives at the Ed Sullivan Theater to film the CelebriGum Super Bowl commercial, which will air during the second quarter of the game on February 5th.  

I paid NBC $3.5 million for the 30 second spot, plus about a million more to hire Tom and shoot the commercial.  It now occurs to me that this may have been a terrible idea, since CelebriGum doesn't sell anything.

Oh well.  Live and learn.

COMPLETELY SERIOUS P.S.: During halftime of the Super Bowl, I will reveal the answer to the question that has been asked ever since the dawn of CelebriGum: who chewed the gum? I thought it would be a mystery forever, but new information recently came to light, and it checks out.  Watch this space.

15 comments:

  1. Were you able to confirm the identity of the chewer using modern DNA testing? Or, did you just ask Radio Man who dunnit?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No invasive testing. All humint.

      Delete
    2. Had to Google "humint." For a second, I thought maybe it was a flavor like "pep-o-mint" or "wint-o-green."

      Delete
    3. I thought it was a Soylent Green after dinner mint.

      Delete
  2. The Toast in the MachineJanuary 16, 2012 at 8:56 PM

    Here's another question which has plagued mankind since the dawn of CelebriGum:
    How did you manage to get that actual life-size shot of Tom Cruise?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Special lenses that cost thousands of dollars. More ill-conceived CelebriGum spending.

      Delete
    2. By the way, great to see The Toast pop up!

      You must get that a lot. Sorry.

      Delete
  3. Maybe you should have Maury do a "who is the gummy daddy" show

    ReplyDelete
  4. You spelled his name wrong. It's Tom Kruse, inventor of the Hoveround. (I watch the Price is Right)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Las Vegas bookies are betting that Sarah Palin will be joining Dave, Oprah, and Jay Leno in this year's CBS super bowl commercial. Is there anyone else the LS has pissed off since the last CBS super bowl commercial? I need to place my own bet.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'd like to see Dave somehow bring back Johnny Carson. That would be a good commercial.

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete